Akan ada saatnya dimana aku bisa menatapmu, tanpa sekat. 

Am I Depressed?

Sometimes you need to know about yourself, and if there is something wrong about you, you will be able to fix it as soon as possible, right?

So.. after years by years, I feel there is something wrong in me. and I realized that this peculiarity makes a lot of problems in my life. and then I'm trying to continue to find out until I see the results....

Now I know what problems exist in myself...

Ok, I will explain more about this five disorder, maybe can help you :) 

Major Depression:

During these episodes, symptoms occur most of the day, nearly every day and may include:

Feelings of sadness, tearfulness, emptiness or hopelessness

Angry outbursts, irritability or frustration, even over small matters

Loss of interest or pleasure in most or all normal activities, such as sex, hobbies or sports

Sleep disturbances, including insomnia or sleeping too much

Tiredness and lack of energy, so even small tasks take extra effort

Changes in appetite like, often reduced appetite and weight loss, but increased cravings for food and weight gain.

Anxiety, agitation or restlessness.

Slowed thinking, speaking or body movements.

Feelings of worthlessness or guilt, fixating on past failures or blaming yourself for things that aren't your responsibility.

Trouble thinking, concentrating, making decisions and remembering things.

Unexplained physical problems, such as back pain or headaches.

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Dysthimia:

You may lose interest in normal daily activities, feel hopeless, lack productivity, and have low self-esteem and an overall feeling of inadequacy. These feelings last for years and may significantly interfere with your relationships, school, work and daily activities.

If you have persistent depressive disorder, you may find it hard to be upbeat even on happy occasions you may be described as having a gloomy personality, constantly complaining or incapable of having fun. Though persistent depressive disorder is not as severe as major depression, your current depressed mood may be mild, moderate or severe. Because of the chronic nature of persistent depressive disorder, coping with depression symptoms can be challenging, but a combination of talk therapy (psychotherapy) and medication can be effective in treating this condition.Click for more explanation

Bipolar Disorder:

I'm very hard to explain explicitly maybe you should find out and read a lot about this disorder.

There are several types of bipolar and related disorders. For each type, the exact symptoms of bipolar disorder can vary from person to person. Bipolar I and bipolar II disorders also have additional specific features that can be added to the diagnosis based on your particular signs and symptoms.

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Cyclothymia:

This is a mental state characterized by marked swings of mood between depression and elation; bipolar disorder. I'm kind of the depressive symptoms. 

Signs and symptoms of the lows of cyclothymia may include:

• Feeling sad, hopeless or empty
• Tearfulness
• Irritability, especially in children and teenagers
• Loss of interest in activities once considered enjoyable
• Changes in weight
• Feelings of worthlessness or guilt
• Sleep problems
• Restlessness
• Fatigue or feeling slowed down
• Problems concentrating Click for more explanation

Seasonal affective disorder:

It's normal to have some days when you feel down (SAD). But if you feel down for days at a time and you can't get motivated to do activities you normally enjoy, see your doctor. This is especially important if your sleep patterns and appetite have changed or if you feel hopeless, think about suicide, or turn to alcohol for comfort or relaxation.

In some people with bipolar disorder, fall/winter/rainy (in Indonesia) and summer can bring on symptoms of mania or a less intense form of mania (hypomania), and fall and winter can be a time of depression.

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You can test about yourself in here